


how much could happen in a year?

by wallflowergarden



Category: Haikyuu!!
Genre: Asexual Character, First Kiss, M/M, i havent read much of the manga yet so forgive me for any errors, lots and lots of kissing, takes place in the beginning of their second year, thats tsukki for ya
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2015-04-05
Updated: 2015-10-11
Packaged: 2018-03-21 10:51:48
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 8,684
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/3689490
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/wallflowergarden/pseuds/wallflowergarden
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>At a "Welcome back to the hell hole we call school" party, a game that's a combination of spin the bottle and seven minutes in heaven leads two friends to begin a confusing series of events that deal with platonic feelings becoming romantic feelings, the idea of first relationships, and many things that aren't exactly part of a perfect, happy love story.</p>
<p>But really, how much could happen in a year?</p>
            </blockquote>





	1. Chapter 1

**Author's Note:**

> hello! thanks for opening this! i've had this written for a while now but i didn't feel like posting it?? well, here ya go. 
> 
> OH and there are gonna be some bad things that might be a little triggering later, but i'll tag them as they happen.

It's the beginning of the school year, and Nishinoya is holding a party to commence his final year. Despite the fact that his older friends have already graduated, they're attending anyway. His parents are out at some dinner relating to work while nearly half of Karasuno High is over at their house, trashing it beyond recognition without anyone's permission. Their son was always thinking about how lucky he was that his house was so large that it was almost considered a mansion. Now he had finally taken advantage of it. He picked out the best selection of music (which he considered to be obscure American rap artists–Asahi later fixed this for him) and is blaring it through multiple speakers throughout the house. The party is going better than anticipated, with hundreds of people enjoying themselves and Nishinoya being treated like the emperor. Currently he's hosting a game considered "childish" by a few of the players: seven minutes in heaven.

"But we're gonna change the rules a little, alright? So if you don't wanna participate after you hear our new rules–"

 _"His,"_ Asahi interrupts Nishinoya, adjusting his ponytail. He didn't want any part of this, and was only allowed to spectate because he was a co-planner of the party, along with Tanaka. He wanted to make sure that nothing too bad would happen to his friends. " _His_ new rules."

"... Right," he shoots a brief glance to Asahi before returning to his happier aura. "Then, feel free to leave! You're not obligated to stay. We want this to be as fun as possible for everyone."

"So what exactly are these new rules?" Suga questions from his seat on the floor, a little smile on his face because of how ridiculously cocky Nishinoya was acting. He's even more confident than usual. It's obvious he's overjoyed about having all the control of this party.

"They're simple! Normally, you have to option to do whatever you want, right? Not this time!" Everyone sitting in the circle looks around suspiciously, half afraid to hear what's coming next. "You and your lucky one will have to kiss for the entire seven minutes! It should make things more interesting." This time, people react more. There are groans, laughs, some even look flustered. As anticipated, a couple teens scoot their way out, but the majority stay. With a few others, nearly the entire team is here.

"Wait a minute... Where are all the girls?!" Tanaka yells seriously. There are three girls in the circle: two of them are Yachi and Kiyoko and the other is Michimiya.

"I'm sure you scared them away when you took your shirt off, which, by the way, please put it back on," says Tsukishima, making not just his friend next to him giggle. Tanaka glumly does as ordered.

Tsukishima doesn't really want to be here. Yamaguchi was going to spend the night over at his house, and they were just hanging out when Hinata drove over to his house (according to Kageyama, he was pretty reckless about it), insisting he'd come, Yamaguchi too. Of course, this wasn't working on Tsukishima, which forced Hinata to use drastic measures, meaning he pulled him to the car against his own will. Yamaguchi tried his best to keep his friend, but Hinata managed to grab ahold of him too. Eventually, they gave up. Which lead them here. Throughout the car ride, Hinata tried to convince Tsukishima that the party "will be fun" and "a good experience." Yamaguchi tried to do the same, though reluctant. He didn't want Tsukishima angry with him. He kind of wanted to go to this party, and was glad that he was on his way.

He mutters to Yamaguchi that they should go elsewhere, until Nishinoya calls him out when they stand up.

"Nope! Sorry, but you're staying. You had your chance to go." Tsukishima can hear Hinata attempting to hide a giggle. Yamaguchi looks up to his friend, trying to detect his current emotion and see if he could talk to him without getting yelled to shut up.

"But you just said–"

"Well, the whole team's here! So you're stuck, sorry!" Nishinoya smiles in a way that gives Tsukishima the urge to punch it.

"Tsukishima, if you don't wanna say, you don't have to," Asahi reminds. Tsukishima knows this, but there's something inside him, something stubborn that makes him want to stay, so that he doesn't look dumb.

"Fine, fine, whatever. We'll stay." Nishinoya cheers in success. "But don't expect anything stupid out of us." The other boy rolls his eyes in doubt. Yamaguchi, who has been almost completely silent for the entirety of the party, is happy to hear Tsukishima saying "we" and "us." He rarely does it, so it's nice to hear.

"And now, without further ado," Nishinoya scans the circle of many emotions with a devious grin on his face. "We begin!"

He places a bottle in the center and makes some random person spin it, the aforementioned person being chosen from a piece of paper drawn from a hat. Earlier, he said that he couldn't decided between spin the bottle or seven minutes in heaven so this was his "in-between game." Asahi didn't approve.

The first person to spin is Suga. As if it were the stars at work, or fate playing a card, or even cheating, the bottle stopped on his boyfriend, Daichi. Hinata and a few others called him Suga's "future fiancé" (He had given Suga a promise ring before they graduated. They created a big scene for everyone, so the team was all very aware of them). Nishinoya deemed this "unfair!" and demanded a re-spin. The giggling couple disagree and claim they have to, since it's the rules. Multiple people back them up and Nishinoya is defeated. So the two head back into the bedroom, followed by the "committee" (Nishinoya, Tanaka, and reluctantly Asahi) and whoever wants to follow. They didn't check often, considering they're a couple. But it was hard to break them up, seven minutes later.

Next up is Yachi. She spins the bottle around. Tanaka, Nishinoya, and a few select others get really excited, since it's one of the few girls' turn. Plus, she's absolutely adorable. But, it lands on Kiyoko. She just so happens to be the girl Yachi is crushing on big time, although only Hinata and Kageyama knew this. Kageyama has to contain Hinata. The boys all fall in defeat, deeply saddened by the chosen one of the bottle. Yachi blushes furiously, even the almost always stoic Kiyoko has some red in her cheeks. After some convincing, the two girls head to the room. During their seven minutes, their kisses are very awkward and slight. But, being a straight boy, Tanaka didn't seem to mind. He forgot all about his crush on Kiyoko. They both jumped up when the timer went off, and Yachi apologized profusely.

Once the girls are out, the next person is selected. Nishinoya pulls a name out of a baseball cap and...

"Aww, look! It's little Yamaguchi!" The crowd make reaction noises upon hearing this. Yamaguchi is one of the few people in circle who is called a "pure virgin," meaning he's never had sex, never been kissed, never dated. So they all can't _wait_ to see what happens next. Yamaguchi gets all flustered, cheeks redder than ever before. Tsukishima only glances at him, but inside he feels some concern for his friend.

With people cheering him on, Yamaguchi leans over to spin the bottle. Everyone watches with anticipation as it spins around, briefly pointing at everyone in the circle before it lands on...

... Yamaguchi.

"Huh. Well, Yamaguchi, go jack off in the bedroom," Nishinoya comments, causing the group the break into laughter. Tsukishima can tell that Yamaguchi is unfamiliar with the slang term so he whispers the definition in his ear. There's more laughter after seeing his surprised face and flaring red cheeks. "I'm just kidding, you innocent bastard. The rule for that is to go with the person on your right..." Asahi and Tanaka shoot looks of confusion at Nishinoya, but he doesn't seem to notice. All eyes then fall on the person on Yamaguchi's right. "So..."

Tsukishima Kei.

"Oh."

There are giggles from anonymous people. Everyone, and that means _everyone,_ knows how close the two are. Even if you don't know them personally, you don't know of them separate. The idea of the two of them together was constantly joked about. Whenever they disappeared at lunch, people said they were making out behind the school. When they both arrived late to practice, they were fooling around in the locker room. They knew that none of these things happened, but after tonight they can know for sure that they've made out.

"Ah, the tale to the two best friends who turn into lovers because of one fateful night. You can thank me later."

"Wow, I don't even know where to begin with that," Tsukishima replies. Yamaguchi is stunned silent. "Look, we don't need to partake in some dumb party game. I didn't even want to come."

"What, did your future boyfriend convince you?" Yamaguchi is practically on fire at this point. Nishinoya always makes little remarks like this, but they aren't usually directed at Yamaguchi and Tsukishima. "You know, I'm not surprised you wouldn't be up to it. Just like you."

"Noya, leave them be," Asahi interjects. Tsukishima is glaring at Nishinoya, then to Asahi. He can almost hear him saying, _'You don't have to if you don't want to.'_ That look combined with Nishinoya's statement is enough to make him grab Yamaguchi's wrist and yank him upward.

"Fine." The crowd cheers and yells as Tsukishima storms off to the designated bedroom with Yamaguchi. The door shuts behind them, the entire school gathered around to hear Noya's report from looking through the keyhole. This is bound to be interesting.

"Tsukki–"

"Just, relax." Although, he don't sound comforting. He just sounds angry. The two of them are sitting on the end of a bed. Looking around, it looks like Nishinoya's room.  There are clothes scattered everywhere and posters drenching the walls, from famous volleyball players to partially exposed women. They're sitting in silence for a few seconds, Tsukishima seeming bored and Yamaguchi being as jittery as ever. "We don't actually have to do any–"

"Yes, you do!" The party host interrupts. There's laughing. "We're not letting you out until the timer stops, and we're not starting the timer until you start a-kissing! Now get on it!" More laughing.

"You know what?" Tsukishima asks quickly to Yamaguchi. "Let's just do it, okay? Who cares? Then we can go home." Yamaguchi flares again.

"B-B-But Ts-Tsukki! I-I–" He's turned into a red stuttery mess. "I, uh, I!" Tsukishima doesn't feel like waiting, so he just rolls his eyes and kisses him.

Yamaguchi instantly calms. He feels no stress, no nervousness, no anxiety. His shoulders slowly drop and his muscles relax. He feels at ease. The party people are keeping up their laughing fits and high-fiving.

"See? Not that bad. Jeez." Tsukishima pulled back for a moment. His friend looks totally different to him now. The fidgety scared boy now looks at peace. If he looks closely, he can see him smiling just a bit. "Now we just need to keep that up. Think you can manage?" Yamaguchi nods and says nothing. Tsukishima returns and kisses him again. At first, they're just little pecks. Small touches of probably forced affection. But then they learn how to kiss with their mouths open, without an instruction manual. Yamaguchi begins to feel just a little uncomfortable; he's never kissed anyone before. Kissing on its own was fine, but "movie kissing," as he called it, feels a bit weird. He feels Tsukishima placing his hand on his arm. He's not sure how to feel about this. Maybe he should do something similar in return? Yamaguchi puts his hand on Tsukishima's neck. This causes Tsukki to pull back an inch or so. His eyes aren't looking as Yamaguchi's.

"Tsukki?" He speaks as soft as possible, as if he could potentially scare him away. "Are you o–" The blond cuts him off with another kiss, a deeper one this time. He holds Yamaguchi's face and pulls him closer, closer than he thought he could be with anyone. Yamaguchi can't believe this is happening. Tsukishima has so much... so much passion, he's never seen him like this before. Their kissing is getting faster, just by a bit. Their bodies are getting closer, by even more. Soon, they're completely wrapped in the other, hands moving through hair, around fabric, or wherever they so damn please. They're even sounds being made. From _themselves._ Yamaguchi didn't know people actually made these sounds. He thought they were just special effects of any romance scene.

There are knocks on the door, but the boy's are unphased. Seconds later, more knocks, still nothing. Nishinoya calls out at them, no response.

"Guys!" They finally detach and see Nishinoya in the doorway, Tsukishima looking angry from being interrupted, Yamaguchi looking the most embarrassed he's been in his life. "The seven minutes ended two minutes ago! Contain yourselves!" Yamaguchi jumps up from the bed upon seeing the entire team staring into the bedroom. _'They probably watched us when we were kissing,_ ' he thinks. They did. Tsukishima sighs, standing up. He doesn't need to signal to Yamaguchi to assure that he follows, so he just exits the room, bowing sarcastically (it’s more of a curtsy than a bow, which makes it feel more sarcastic) to Nishinoya at the door. Everyone was cheering and clapping as the exited, which made the whole thing worse on Yamaguchi. When Tsukishima gets back to where the circle was, he doesn't stop walking.

"Tsukki? Where are you going?" Once again, everyone is watching them like they're a walking theatrical production.

"We're going home. C'mon." He puts on his coat and Yamaguchi catches his when Tsukishima throws it at him. The crowd goes _'ooooo'_ at them.

"Oh, hey! They're gonna go have sex at Tsukishima's place!" Tanaka shouts out, including himself in the teasing.

"Yep! We are. We'll send pics, okay?" Tsukishima responds, surprising everyone as they leave the house. Their laughter can be heard from outside. Yamaguchi looks at his friend nervously.

"W-Wait, what?! We are?!" Tsukishima slips his hands in his pockets and begins to walk to his house in the dark, Yamaguchi trailing behind him.

"Don't be stupid, Yamaguchi. Of course we're not. You know I'm asexual."

"Oh. Right." Yamaguchi, feeling dumb, catches up to his friend. Now _this_ feels normal. He's used to walking right next to Tsukishima in silence. This is comfortable. Walking like this is something they do everyday. In fact, Yamaguchi looks forward to it. As far as he knows, that could be the most interaction they got all day. Sure, they have class together, but there isn't much to do besides lunch. During lunch, all there is is a silence, it rarely felt like they were eating lunch _together_ together. Something about walking like this felt so genuine. So real. You can walk next to anyone and have it mean nothing, but when you're walking next to someone you care about who cares about you, it's really... nice. It's like a way of declaring friendship. And it's nice to have a friend. He's calming down a little, his heart is returning to a normal pace. Everything is great, until he gets an impulse. He wants to... Hold Tsukishima's hand? Why? Maybe because it's cold out and his hands aren't in his pockets. He goes to put them in his coat pockets, but instead he puts one his Tsukishima's. By accident.

"What are you doing?" He asks, pulling his hand out along with Yamaguchi's. He stops walking and looks down at him. Yamaguchi wonders if he can pass his red cheeks off as an effect from the cold.

"Oh, I–I, uh. I wanted to see if you got my phone." It's lame, but it's the best Yamaguchi could come up with.

"Why would I have your phone? Did you check your pockets?" Yamaguchi knows where his phone is, of course he does. He wishes he came up with something better.

"Oh. Yeah. Here it is," he replies after sticking his hands in his pockets. There's no more talking after that. All a sudden, it's  awkward. Yamaguchi doesn't like this. He wants it to be over soon. When Tsukishima's house comes into view, Yamaguchi fails to hold back his urges. He grabs his friend's hand, discreetly linking their fingers (Tsukishima doesn't refuse this, so it's okay, right?), and speeds toward his house.

"Hey!" Yamaguchi ignores him. He wants this unusual tension to end. They run hand in hand through the brisk spring air. Upon arriving at the door, Yamaguchi searches for the key in Tsukishima's coat pocket and he doesn't protest. When they get inside, Tsukishima's mother greets them both. Yamaguchi has been over so many times that he just call Tsukki's mother "mom." She's gotten used to it. Yamaguchi's still in a rush, so he runs up the stairs to Tsukishima's room and waits there. It's not much later that he shows up.

"Dude, are you alright?" He asks with not too much compassion in his voice as he shuts the door. Yamaguchi doesn't reply. He simply sits on the bed and waits until Tsukishima tells him to do something. _"Hey."_ He leans down with his hands on his knees in front of Yamaguchi's face. Due to the closeness of their faces, Tsukishima kisses him. For whatever reason. Once. Twice. Then they're laying down on the bed, not sure how they got here. Minutes ago, they were at a party, hadn't kissed once. Now, they're laying on Tsukishima's bed, having kissed countless times. Yamaguchi has been thinking like this a lot tonight. He's still struggling with the idea that their relationship has completely changed within an hour. But he's not thinking about that now. Right now, he's hoping to God that Tsukishima's mother doesn't hear him from the bedroom.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> OK SO o i have a LOT planned for this and even a tiny bit written out, but i dunno if i'm gonna write more?? sorry it's a kind of a cliffhanger for a "i dont know if i'll finish this or not" thing. i'll just see how it's received! :O thanks for reading!


	2. Chapter 2

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> SO i guess i'm continuing this aha.. i do have lot planned for it so i hope i can finish it and i hope you all enjoy it!

The next morning, they awake in Tsukki's comfy bed, like they always do when spending the night here. Yamaguchi routinely wakes up first. He's pressed up against Tsukishima's chest and there's an arm around him. When Yamaguchi taps his nose, he shuffles in his sleep and pulls him even closer. This makes him smile. He shuts his eyes again. He doesn't mind staying like this for a while. Unfortunately, the light coming from the window that's directly above the bed burns through his eyelids, so he chooses to turn around, but this movement accidentally wakes Tsukishima. He turns around again to look at his friend directly. His eyes are blinking in an attempt to wake up, but it's easy tell he'd rather be asleep. When his eyes finally stay open, the two of them just look at each other. In silence. It's kind of... Weird. But comforting. Peaceful. Continuing this lack of conversation, Tsukishima sits upright. Yamaguchi watches him. He doesn't move much, just looks out the window and runs his hand through his hair. Yamaguchi has to catch his breath. The image of Tsukki against the light of the morning mixed with the details of waking up is a little overwhelming for Yamaguchi. But why? What is it?

"You okay, Yamaguchi?" He can't tell, or maybe he can, but he face is so warm that he's a fire hazard. Tsukishima took this for being sick, not embarrassed. For that, Yamaguchi is thankful. He nods his head slightly enough that Tsukki can see. He shrugs and leans over Yamaguchi to reach for his glasses. Yamaguchi flinches as he does this. What is _happening?_ As soon as the boy has his glasses, the freckled one gets out of bed instantly, still wearing his clothes from last night.

Suddenly things get really real. They're both awake. They're both conscious. As they search for something to talk about, they can't help to think about last night. All that happened. It's not a normal night for two best friends, not in the slightest. It's uncomfortable. Now it's a race to see who speaks up first. Part of Yamaguchi can't let Tsukishima be that person.

"So... About last n–"

"Don't even start, Yamaguchi." Hearing this puts him on edge. Seeing him looking unamused and bored nearly makes him fall off. "It was just a dumb party game. It meant absolutely nothing. I knew you'd overthink it and get all sensitive." He stands up and starts to walk toward the door.

"B-But, what about when we got home? We–"

"I dunno, maybe I had too much to drink. My head hurts, so I wouldn't be surprised." He shrugs. "Stop thinking about it so much. I'm gonna go take a shower." And he goes to do exactly that. The door shuts and Yamaguchi is left with himself.

It's the first time he's been alone in Tsukishima's room, and he _really_ doesn't like it. He has to face the facts, or else he's gonna cave in and splatter on the floor. He likes Tsukishima. He has for a while. And not just in the friendly way, when it's possible to get by from talking and hanging out every so often. When you don't crave their touch every moment and you don't find yourself lost in thought about them. It's the romantic way, when you _do_ crave their touch every moment and find yourself lost in thought about them. When you regret every time you didn't kiss them or hug them. When you find yourself alone in their room and your stomach is filled with butterflies of something you determine to be nervousness but you truly know it's excitement. Yamaguchi sits up on the bed. His slaps his face with both hands in an attempt to wake himself from whatever dream he thought he was living. It doesn't work. He even tries to scratch the red off, like his cheeks are coated in this thin layer of blush _just_ to humiliate him. Down the hall he can hear the shower starting. Images of Tsukishima undressing force themselves into Yamaguchi's head. He's ashamed of this. He shouldn't be thinking such dirty thoughts about his best friend. In an attempt to clear his mind, he pulls out his phone and takes an extended time checking his social media accounts. Minutes later, Tsukishima reenters his room, towel around his waist and very wet. It takes every atom in Yamaguchi's body working together to keep him calm.

"Hey."

"Hi." He shifts on the bed, trying to remain cool.

"Were you alright on your own? Didn't think too much about stupid stuff, right?" He doesn't look at Yamaguchi and begins to pick his clothes out.

"Uh, yeah. I was just on Facebook, and stuff." Tsukishima nods in acknowledgement. After that, the conversation finishes out and Yamaguchi looks away while Tsukishima gets dressed. He instead looks out the window and tries not to think too much. Soon enough, Tsukishima snaps to signal it's okay to look again.

"Come on, let's go." Yamaguchi tilts his head in question.

"Where are we going?"

"I'm gonna drive you home?"

"Oh. Yeah." Yamaguchi stands up to collect his things, but then realizes he has nothing. So he follows Tsukishima out to the car in silence. And they sit in the car in silence. They've been talking way less in the past twelve hours. Even Tsukishima feels uncomfortable with this. Especially after what happened with them. He shrugged it off as something trivial, but Yamaguchi knows that it meant something to him, he just doesn't want to say so.

Sooner or later, depending on whether you were in the car or not, they arrive at Yamaguchi's house. It's still silent.

"So um... Thanks for the ride, Tsukki." The blond simply nods in response. That's normal, though. Yamaguchi always thanked him and Tsukishima rarely spoke words back. He's reluctant whilst getting out of the car. He doesn't really like this awkward car, but he does enjoy Tsukishima's presence. He opens the door, almost against his own will, and he's interrupted instantly.

"Hey, Yamaguchi, wait." He sits back down and looks to his friend.

"Yeah?" Then he's being kissed again. He keeps his eyes open this time from pure shock. Although he doesn't resist. He can see Tsukishima inhale then exhale. He looks so relaxed. He moves a hand underneath Yamaguchi's chin and tilts his head upward. A few seconds after that, Tsukishima withdraws. They make eye contact and things are all very real again. There was no excuse for that. Nothing like a teenage party game or "a little too much to drink." It was a conscious decision. He meant to do that, he wanted to. And there was something in him that couldn't wait until a later time to act on that decision. Yamaguchi realizes this all within the single look Tsukishima is giving him. Yamaguchi wants to kiss him. Apparently, Tsukishima wants the same in return. He's leaning forward again, but for whatever reason that he's going to regret later, Yamaguchi jumps back. He hits his head on the window by accident, but he's not focusing on the pain right now. He mutters some things that are barely words and fumbles with the handle, nearly falling out of the car as he opens the door. He manages to produce the sentence, _'See you later, Tsukki!'_ – though it's almost incoherent. Tsukishima is confused but also understanding at the same. Yamaguchi slams the door and runs up to his house. The car doesn't drive away for a few seconds. Yamaguchi then struggles with the lock and figures out a way inside. Ignoring greetings from his parents, he locks himself in his room, left to contemplate what the _hell_ just happened.

* * *

They don’t talk for while. That being a few days. Everyone on the team is off-put by the lack of interaction. Normally, these two are inseparable. Even though Tsukishima never seems to enjoy Yamaguchi’s company, they all know that they are pretty much lost without each other. The two of them are mutually avoiding the other. Yamaguchi’s nervous about what could happen. He doesn’t want their friendship to fall apart. Then again, he has to know why Tsukki had done what he had done that weekend. It’s afternoon practice on Wednesday and he hasn’t stopped thinking about it. Practice is finishing out with individual training, partnering up to rehearse some basic tosses and receives. Yamaguchi was quick to take Hinata before he could find Kageyama. Tsukishima sends him a look before pairing up a first year who's slightly afraid of him. They lock gazes until Hinata snaps Yamaguchi out of it.

"Hey, _dude._ " The boy looks slowly to his friend. Before he knows it, Hinata serves a ball right to his face. Yamaguchi only has a slight second to dodge, throwing a hand up and stepping back. The ball bounces back to Hinata and he catches it with both hands. "Talk to me? Now?"

"What about practice?" He doesn't sound like he cares that much himself.

"We have practice twice a day, six times a week, and we already did enough today. And this seems really important." Hinata is never this serious, especially about things that aren't volleyball related. Yamaguchi knows this, and doesn't like his friends worrying about him. To avoid coach yelling at them, though, they do simple receives back and forth. Hinata asks what's going on with him and Tsukishima, and Yamaguchi pours out the whole story, from almost holding his hand to the kiss in the car.

"Holy _crap_ , Yamaguchi." He holds the ball that was just sent to him and doesn't send it back. "That's... Whoa."

"What do I do? You've gotta help me. Please." Hinata falls silent, then looks around him. Coach isn't watching, neither is anyone else. So he "accidentally" bumps a ball toward the supply closet with a half-hearted oops. Yamaguchi is slow to pick up what Hinata was trying to do, only understanding when he's signaled over. They sneak into the closet where they can’t be seen before they continue talking.

“Okay, okay. First- Tsukishima? Really?” That’s not what Yamaguchi was hoping to hear. He glares at Hinata who seems completely serious.

“Kageyama? Really?”

Hinata falls silent.

“You know what, that’s off topic, let’s get back to you.” Yamaguchi smirks with success, then prepares himself to heard Hinata’s advice. “All in seriousness, I’m totally okay with you liking him, and I think it’s wonderful, but right now, it seems like he’s really conflicted with his feelings toward you. Like, he doesn’t know what he wants. So I think the best thing you should is just talk to him about it. You guys avoiding each other all the time isn’t gonna solve anything.” His shoulders sink. He sort of thought that was the right thing to do, he just _really_ doesn’t want to.

“Okay, so I do. What do I talk to him about? Where do I begin?” Hinata takes a second to think, looking into the gym. Tsukishima receives the ball and sends it back perfectly. The first year he’s working with looks very nervous.

“Start by asking him questions. I’m sure you have a bunch.” He does. “First ask little questions, like what was with the kiss in the car, then lead into asking something like… I dunno. If he has feelings for you or wants a relationship with you?” Yamaguchi widens his eyes in horror.

“I’ think I’d throw up if I tried doing that.” Hinata sighs.

“You’ve gotta try. I mean, come on. He’s not going to stop being your friend. Believe it or not, that guy really cares about you.” Yamaguchi’s heartbeat speeds up. “He wouldn’t know what to do without you. I know from a friend of a friend that he’s already stressed out by not talking to you.” That sentence is louder to Yamaguchi than the rest of what Hinata is saying.

“What? Really?” He nods.

“Kenma told me, Kuroo told Kenma, Tsukishima told Kuroo. It’s all connected.” The information seems small to Hinata, so he waves it away, while Yamaguchi is replaying in his head over and over. It’s nice to know you’re needed by someone you need. Especially since he felt like he was always a hinderance to Tsukki. “Hey, relax man. I know everything will work out.” Yamaguchi nods this time. This is when a whistle is blown and the team is supposed to gather up before practice is dismissed. After Hinata lightly hits Yamaguchi’s back, the two join the rest of the team and listen to coach give them the overview of practice. When he’s finished, Tsukishima is asked to meet behind the gym after they’ve finished changing.

* * *

It’s silent. Dark. Tsukishima is glaring down at Yamaguchi, who is nervously fiddling with the hem of his sweater. A breeze goes by that runs through their hair and holds out the silence, putting them more on edge. Stalling becomes noticeable. Soon, Tsukishima is going to say something angry, or just leave. In order to keep his focus, Yamaguchi makes a sound that’s reminiscent of “um,” and Tsukki shifts in his shoes.

“So…” He recalls Hinata’s advice. “First, it was the game. Then, it was because you had too much to drink. But… Why did you kiss me in the car?” Tsukishima was expecting something like this. He shrugs.

“Because I wanted to.”

If you could see inside Yamaguchi’s head like a movie, you would see a single question mark. The audience laughs.

“You… What?”

“You heard me. I wanted to kiss you again.” Yamaguchi waits for an explanation to the most absurd thing he’s ever heard, but upon not getting one, he asks himself. Tsukki shrugs again. “I dunno. I guess I liked it before. It was my first kiss, and I know it was yours too.” Yamaguchi tries not to turn into a stuttery, blushing bright red mess like before with an unsteady but quick heart rate, but ultimately fails. He doesn’t know what to do. He’s feeling nauseous like he predicted early, can’t get out more than one syllable, and is beginning to lose steady breathing patterns. Tsukishima takes the chance to kiss him. Yamaguchi works on calming down. This is comfortable, and oddly familiar. He holds onto him and doesn’t let go even after the kiss. Tsukki does the same.

“So, what does all this mean to you?” Yamaguchi speaks softer now, adjusting the collar of Tsukishima’s jacket in order to prevent direct eye contact. “Aren’t we supposed to be like… Dating, or something?” He _cannot_ believe he managed to choke out that sentence.

“We can be.” He smiles. Tsukishima puts a hand on his head. Yamaguchi forces Tsukki into a hug, and it's well received. This would be their first relationships, and it's with each other. It's kind of cool, actually. For as long as this Tsukishima-crush existed Yamaguchi never thought this would happen. He thought that he had higher standards, and wouldn't settle for someone like himself. But he was wrong, apparently.

"Okay."

The moment is soon ruined by the shouting and cheering of the team as they emerge from around the corner, Hinata and Noya leading the pack. They’ve been watching the whole time. Tsukishima turns to look at them, arm around Yamaguchi’s waist and annoyance on his face. Yamaguchi covers his face with both his hands to not only hide his embarrassment but to avoid looking at them. The team is cheering “I knew this would happen,” “Praise the Lord,” and things of the like. Hinata announces that he’s going to text Daichi, Suga, and Asahi with the news.

“And guess what!” Nishinoya says loudly to get attention. “It’s all ‘cause of me!” People ask why as Tsukki rolls his eyes and Yamaguchi decides to look up now. “I changed the rules slightly at the party so that you two would get each other!” Even Tsukishima looks surprised.

“I _knew_ it!” Tanaka exclaims, pointing to Nishinoya.

* * *

_With people cheering him on, Yamaguchi leans over to spin the bottle. Everyone watches with anticipation as it spins around, briefly pointing at everyone in the circle before it lands on..._

_... Yamaguchi._

_"Huh. Well, Yamaguchi, go jack off in the bedroom," Nishinoya comments, causing the group the break into laughter. Tsukishima can tell that Yamaguchi is unfamiliar with the slang term so he whispers the definition in his ear. There's more laughter after seeing his surprised face and flaring red cheeks. "I'm just kidding, you innocent bastard. The rule for that is to go with the person on your right..." Asahi and Tanaka shoot looks of confusion at Nishinoya, but he doesn't seem to notice. All eyes then fall on the person on Yamaguchi's right. "So..."_

* * *

“The rule was to go with the person on your  _left!_ Noya, you sneaky bastard.” The accused beams with pride.

“But look! Everything worked out!” He gestures to the new couple. “Congratulations, you gay men.” The team all applauds. Yamaguchi hides

again in Tsukishima’s jacket and he’s taken away from the scene. From there, they walk to Tsukishima’s house together. They hold hands as Yamaguchi chatters with excitement. He even gets Tsukki to genuinely smile for the first time in a while. Yamaguchi is filled with life after the events of the night. He’s in disbelief; He doesn’t understand how any of this could be happening. How could he get so lucky?

When they get to his house, he offers to walk Yamaguchi home, but the freckled boy denies. Then they share a good night/goodbye kiss. It’s the realest one they had so far. Now they’re a defined couple, a _real_ couple. Yamaguchi smiles and even laughs, accidentally causing Tsukishima to join him. He loves how happy he is from this. It’s nice to see him showing some sort of emotion. He really hopes things can stay this happy for a long time.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> but they won't :) i hope you're all ready cuz it's gonna get hella angsty soon


	3. Chapter 3

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ITS BEEN FOUR MONTHS FORGIVE ME  
> with the start of season two i have been inspired  
> now that we're getting to the fun stuff here's hoping i'll be better with updates yeahe
> 
> this one is really short and bad btw! enjoy

Dating is nice. Yamaguchi wishes he could've done this sooner it. The first month is beyond amazing. It’s all he has dreamed of. They hold hands, go on dates, have simple kisses in public that last much longer when they’re on their own. Making out kind of made him nervous at first, despite the fact they’ve done before. But it was surprisingly easy to get used to. The team teased them constantly during this month, then it started to slow down and become the norm that the two were in a relationship. Tsukishima’s mother was unbelievably happy to hear the news. She always knew that Yamaguchi was perfect for her son. She knew he would treat him right. Fortunately, his mom is a huge advocate for equal rights. She even participated in several protests in her youth. Tsukishima always admired his mother for this. Unfortunately, Yamaguchi’s mother is the opposite, along with his father. They have to be very careful around them. Right now, they’re asleep, so the couple is more relaxed. They’re starting off summer break by sitting on the couch in Yamaguchi’s basement, closer than they would be if his parents were around, not really focused on the movie flashing on the TV screen (it's some old American movie about these kids who got detention on the weekend. Reading subtitles can get a little annoying, though).

"Hey," Tsukishima says, nudging the sleepy boy resting on his shoulder. "You can't fall asleep on me. Your parents would freak out." He's conscious, but not listening. "Babe, seriously." Yamaguchi groans sitting up.

"Fine, but that means I get the couch. You go down there." He nods to the floor. Tsukishima doesn't really want to, but goes to lay on top of the sleeping bag anyway. When they're both laying down (on different elevations), Yamaguchi reaches over to play with his boyfriend's hair and poke at his face.

"Yamaguchi." He takes Tsukishima's glasses off.

"You know," he says, ignoring him. "Now that we're together, we should start using each other's first names."

"Okay. Tadashi." He smiles lightly. Who knew his name could sound so gorgeous? "Now me."

"Kei... Kei." He likes to hear it, too. "Hey, say my name again."

"Tadashi." The dark haired boy giggles.

"Once more."

 _"Tadashi."_ It's a bit of a challenge, but Tadashi leans down to kiss Kei. It's really lovely. He sinks off the couch as the kiss became more thoughtful. It's only a few seconds long before Kei cuts it off and warns Tadashi of the repercussions again. Tadashi ignores him again. It takes several reminders until he retreats back to the couch.

"You're boring."

"I'm just being real, Tadashi." The use of his first name drops the charges.

* * *

"Is this what love feels like? Am I really falling in love with this guy?" Tadashi says while looking at a selfie of the two of them. He had made it his background. Hinata, who’s sitting against Yamaguchi’s bedroom door, smiles warmly over to his friend.

“Could be. How does it feel?”

“Oh, Hinata, it’s amazing.” He drops his arm down on his face to cover his eyes, still holding on to the phone. It’s nearing the end of summer vacation, and due to an overwhelming amount of emotions, Hinata was asked to spend the night. “Absolutely amazing. I’m happy all the time, I can never get him out of my head, all of my plans are with him; He’s all that I could ever ask for. I only want to be with him, dude… It’s like.... Everything’s from a storybook right now.”

“Aww, Yamaguchi, that’s adorable! My little boy is in love. You’re growing up too fast.”

“Shut uuuup.” A pillow is thrown at Hinata. He dodges it and laughs wholeheartedly.

“No, seriously,” Hinata says, still laughing a little. “Can you really say you’re in love with him?”

Tadashi sits on this for a moment. He folds his arm over his stomach and stares thoughtfully at his ceiling. Can he? How do you even know what love feels like? People say that you just. _Know._ But what if you're incorrect and you're mistaking love for something else? He thinks about Kei, more than usual. He rewinds back to the party, which was months ago but felt like yesterday. That's where it all began. Man, he'll never forget it. It was surreal. Putting everything together, it has to be it.

"I can. I am, Hinata, I'm in love with him." He covers his face with his hands, a shy habit of his. Hinata says "aww" again, but it's genuine this time. He goes up to Tadashi laying on his bed and rolls over him to lay next to him.

"That's... Really, really great, man. I'm so happy for you." The two look at each other, Tadashi still hiding partially behind his hands. "AH, I'm jealous. I wanna be in love."

"You'll get there one day, kiddo." He pats his cheek. "Besides, who's saying that Kei is in love with me?"

"Pft, why wouldn't he be?" They look at the ceiling. Now, Tadashi isn't the most self secure person, so there are many things that he could say in response to that. Hinata always gets angry when he depreciates himself, so he doesn't start listing things off. Instead...

"I'm not good enough. I feel like he could do better."

Hinata gives him a deathly glare.

"Seriously! You know how I am."

"I'm gonna fight you, Yamaguchi."

"Do it."

So he does. Hinata pushes Tadashi off the bed. He hits the floor with a laugh. It didn't hurt that much. Hinata jumps on top of him and tries to pin him down, but Tadashi flips him around and easily pinned Hinata down. He's a little bit stronger.

"Ah, almost." Hinata doesn't look amused. "That didn't work out very well for you, did it?" He feels Tadashi's grip loosen and takes advantage of the situation.

"Aha! Now I win!" Tadashi laughs despite being held down. "Never let your guard down!"

"Okay, okay, just get off me."

"No! Let me enjoy my victory." He then throws his fists up and cheers so loud that Tadashi's mother can hear him from downstairs. Tadashi throws him off. Both of them laugh for a little longer than they usually would. The rest of the sleepover consists of rematches until they exhaust themselves. Tadashi won 5 out of 9 matches, thanks to height difference.

* * *

School starts up again and their relationship can be known to the public. They can hold hands to class and kiss briefly before class begins. If only their seats were closer together. They would've been moved due to inappropriate behavior during class. Hinata told Tadashi that their "open cuteness" inspired him to confess to Kageyama. Tadashi is super proud of him and is awaiting the news. In the meantime, Tadashi and Kei eat their lunches together in a new spot everyday. Today is the roof. It's a little cliché, but cliché's are so for a reason. It would be nicer if they were the only people on the roof, but that's tricky when you go to a school with hundreds of people.

"You know, you're right. That's fucking stupid," Kei replies.

 _"Thank_ you! No one agrees with me!"

"How? Seriously, how?"

They've been more comfortable with each other since they started dating. Tadashi couldn't believe what he was missing.

Later that night, Tadashi gets a call from Hinata with his super energetic voice, raving about how well the confession went, how dumbly Kageyama reacted, how glad he was that everything worked out. Kei was over when the call was received and answered on speaker. Hinata had no idea that he was blabbering to both Tadashi _and_ Kei. They both got a kick out of it.

The sun is no longer visible behind the horizon. Tadashi closes his window because it's get colder outside. Kei watches him from a desk chair across the room. After closing the blinds, he sits back down on his bed. They look at each other. And look at each other. They continue until they both start laughing. Tadashi _loves_ this side of him. He only got to see it after they started dating. Kei goes over and sits next to him. Mutual hand grab.

"About five months now," Tadashi speaks quietly.

* * *

November hits, and Tadashi notices more than the creeping cold. Kei has been more distant lately, growing further away everyday. Lunch progressively becomes quieter, silent walks home become overrated. The only thing noisy in their relationship is the interior of Tadashi's mind. He doesn't like these thoughts. They're telling him that he's the problem. He's making the mistakes. Maybe _this_ was the mistake. Should they have remained friends? He... doesn't want that now. For sure. But, if it's what Kei wants, then maybe it's the right thing to do. He tries not to behave any differently at practice. He doesn't want anyone to stop him or worry, like Hinata did before they got together. _I'll just leave it be for now,_ Tadashi thinks on yet another speechless walk home. _I'm sure it's nothing. Probably._

 

The month drags on, exams take place, nothing really changes. Kageyama and Hinata are doing well, though. It's like they sucked the happiness from Kei and Tadashi. It's okay, in Tadashi's opinion. They really need it. While Hinata may argue that their yelling and arguing is playful, Tadashi considers it otherwise. But hey, it's not really his business.

The two go over to Kei’s house after school for an impromptu study session, suggestion from Tadashi. He wants to talk. He doesn’t want to be quiet for twenty minutes again. He wants to blurt something out, anything to break this thick sheet of glass between them. But he doesn't want to create a mess. Shattered glass is hard to walk on. Instead of speech, he decides on physical contact. The cold provides even more excuses to hold hands. Tadashi is honestly expecting him to shake his hand off. He'd even be surprised if he held his hand loosely. But, Kei grips tighter than ever before. It hurts a little. Now Tadashi is just fourteen flavors of confused. He doesn't want to question it, though. He just wants to enjoy this and latch onto it and, for some reason, to cry.

"Kei..." He mutters to himself. Just not as quiet as he intended.

"What?"

"What's going on? What is it? Is it me? Please, just..." He's trying not to cry. He doesn't want to look so weak. They stop walking. It starts snowing. What a cliché.

"What are you talking about?" Tadashi looks up in confusion. Does he really not know? Is he just lying? Or... Is Tadashi over exaggerating? He can't be.

"Wha– You can't be serious, I mean–  You've been oddly... Distant lately, I'm. I'm not making things up... right?" Basing everything off looks may not be a good idea, but to Tadashi, it seems like Kei doesn't understand what he's saying.

"Um." Kei looks at him weirdly. "I think you are. There hasn't been anything different lately. Relax." And the walk continues. Tadashi expected (and wanted) that to last longer. Why can't he just, speak his mind? But, Kei can't either. Do opposites really attract?

* * *

"Ohh, man. I've heard this before." When Hinata speaks, it's not a negative tone, but an understanding one. Tadashi whines a little. This can't be good.

It's been about a week since Tadashi and Kei had their confrontation. Nothing has improved. Honestly, things are getting worse. They don't even walk home together anymore. Tadashi eats lunch with Hinata (like now). If someone walked in on them in practice, they would seem like complete strangers that have no clue what they're doing. Tadashi is getting really, really sad.

"Dude, half of the time someone tells you nothing is wrong is when something is wrong. Actually, like, all the time."

"I-I know... Now." Tadashi plays aimlessly with his food.

"You have to talk to him for real about this. You've got something really great together. You've gotta work things out." Tadashi groans some more, causing Hinata to sigh. Tadashi is bad with receiving advice, but continues to ask for it. "Just. Talk to him after practice. No harm in that."

"But–" Tadashi looks at Hinata for maybe two seconds. Kageyama is sitting with them, but Tadashi was permitted to interrupt. "What if this messes everything up?"

"Don't think like that, Yamaguchi. You guys always work through your problems." He was right. The two have had a good amount of issues so far and they could sort them out pretty easily. This shouldn't go any different, right?

* * *

Practice begins with an emotional bang. Tadashi collectively builds up stress with every pass, every call, every block. He looks over at Kei. God, he loves him so much. There's a huge list of things that Tadashi would do to make sure that everything is okay. Tadashi is spilling over. He's bursting at the seams, he doesn't know how much more he can–

"Kei!" He yells from the sidelines. The ball falls to the ground, hitting the ground and bouncing off the wall. All eyes are on the tall, freckled boy. Kei shows a look that he's passing off as unknowing, but he knows Tadashi sees right through it. "Talk to me outside. Now." Tadashi didn't mean to sound so harsh.

"I'm changing first. It's cold outside." Normally, Coach would've yelled at them both, but he doesn't want to get involved in this. He was informed on their situation. That's all that alters his behavior.

Tadashi waits until Kei is dressed. They walk in silence outside. Again. Tadashi has never felt more nervous.

"What." But now he's just angry.

 _"What?_ What do you mean, _what?!_ You know _exactly_ what! Don't think for a second that you can get me to shut up about this, or that I'm just some dumb child who doesn't recognize what you're doing! Why are you avoiding me? Is it something that I did? Am I really the problem? What's going on?!" The team hears the yelling and gathers around to watch. May not be the politest thing, but they're like a family. They get worried.

"Did you ever think that I just don't want to do this anymore? That I'm sick of you and this relationship?!" Kei yells back without thinking, Tadashi's heart practically sinks to his shoes, and the team is staring in shock.

"S-So what, these past seven months were a lie?! Did you ever even like me?!"

Kei shrugs.

There's something wrong here. As much as Tadashi hurts right now, he knows that something is not right. Kei may act like an uncaring asshole, but Tadashi knows the truth. He was positive that Kei liked him. Positive. Why else do this? Tadashi doesn't want this conversation to go on like this.

"Kei... Come on, please..." Tadashi starts crying. Nothing feels real. "I know you're not like this. Not really."

"Why do you think you know me so well? Who do you think you are?!" This isn't real.

"I thought... I thought I was your _boyfriend!_ I thought you loved me! Because I... I love you..." He mutters the last bit, and Kei pretends he doesn't hear. But the words burn deep into him.

"I don't." The cold hits harder than ever, but the winter outside could never compare to the blizzard in Tadashi's heart. This is all a lie, it's all a lie, it has to be. Tadashi looks into Kei's eyes, but he can't see anything. It's empty. He's empty. Both of them are. They should've never ended like this. "Look, I'm gonna go." And he leaves Tadashi out in the cold to die. He sinks down into the snow, not feeling the stings on his legs. As soon as Kei passed the team, Hinata speeds out to Tadashi and quickly becomes a shoulder to cry on. Tanaka, overwhelmed with fury, tries to pick a fight with Kei. Sugawara, Daichi, and Ukai have to pull them apart before punches get thrown. Tsukishima storms out, leaving Yamaguchi to cry himself to death.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> :)

**Author's Note:**

> OK SO o i have a LOT planned for this and even a tiny bit written out, but i dunno if i'm gonna write more?? sorry it's a kind of a cliffhanger for a "i dont know if i'll finish this or not" thing. i'll just see how it's received! :O thanks for reading!


End file.
